Instead of rushing into the new year, choose to savor a Gentle January. Put your resolutions down, at least for a little while. Turn your attention to slower, softer, more intentional ways to move through January and 2025. For your best health and relationships, it’s time to rest more and stress less.
If you are weeding through an onslaught of New Year’s messages in your social media feeds and inbox, maybe even at the dinner table, press pause. You don’t have to become a new you for the new year, you don’t have to get organized or more disciplined. There’s no need to buckle down, or put your nose to the grindstone. You don’t have to catch up or get ahead this month.
Gentle January: 10 ways to rest more and stress less
Sometimes we do things a certain way just because we’ve always done them that way. Or we do what we think we should do or are expected to do. But what if we could just change our minds and try something else instead? A Gentle January will be a welcome switch to your brain and your body. Slow down. Your heart will thank you for taking your foot off the gas and taking some to decide how you want to spend your time, how you want to treat yourself and others and what kind of life you actually want this year.
Turn off autopilot and turn on curiosity. Shift from pushing through at all costs to easing through. Turn off proving yourself and turn on remembering yourself. Here are 10 ways to savor your Gentle January.
1. Honor your personal time and energy availability.
How much time and energy do I have today? Ask this question every day during your Gentle January. Don’t pretend to have more than you do, just honestly assess what you have to offer and honor that. Some people will have more or less than you and that’s ok. You’ll have more or less than you did yesterday or will have tomorrow and that is ok too. Normalize protecting your precious resources. While you are making these calculations, don’t plan on giving your all. It’s too much. Giving your all means there is nothing left. Save some for you.
2. Press pause on New Year’s resolutions.
You are allowed to make a change in your life anytime you want. That said, if you are only making a change because of the pressure from what’s around you, it will be a struggle. Just because it’s the beginning of a new year, or just because someone else expects something of you won’t be reason enough for lasting change. Use your Gentle January to tap into what’s within you. What do you want?
3. Make your new habits extremely tiny.
If what you want is to start a new habit, make it small, smaller, tiny … extremely tiny. Gentle January doesn’t say, “Go big or go home.” Gentle January says, “Smaller, slower, softer.” A new habit doesn’t have to be “productive” to be successful. A new habit could be as simple as giving yourself an extra five minutes in the morning or in the evening to reconnect with yourself. Try one of these tiny habits that won’t wear you out.
4. Say “no” even when you aren’t busy.
Protect your time and energy, even (or especially) when you aren’t busy. This is the time you deserve to read a book, take a walk or to do nothing at all. Perhaps you are busy savoring your coffee or ordering a pizza and watching a lovely movie. You can say “no” kindly and without a big explanation.
5. Break up with breaking news.
There is no room in a Gentle January for breaking news. If a total break up feels too scary, just take a break. Unsubscribe from news email and social feeds. Set some boundaries around your news consumption. For instance, I don’t “watch” the news, I read it. And I don’t read it in the morning or the evening. Experiment with longer breaks like no news for 24 hours. If you are worried about being uninformed, ask yourself how being over informed is helping you to take action. How does it make you feel. What purpose is it serving. Could you be informed less frequently and less traumatically? Would that help you take action and/or feel better?
6. Enjoy the moment.
So much of our lives is spent getting things done, proving ourselves and seeking validation, comparing our lives away and trying to “get there.” We spend so much time and energy and heartache trying to “get there” that we often forget we are here. We are here in this fleeting moment and we never really get to be anywhere else. Practice being present with these 10 little reminders to help you be in the moment.
7. Be unbothered (especially about things that don’t matter).
How do you respond when things don’t go the way you want them to go? Being upset and frustrated takes a lot of energy. Before you fall into a frustration spiral that turns into stress and anxiety, check in. Ask yourself what’s really bothering you. Then make a list of potential solutions, people who can help and what you might be able to do in order to let the air out of the frustration balloon.
When you feel frustrated or disappointed, could you find some relief in accepting the reality of the situation and moving on? This “check-in” will require a pause and a look at what you are contributing to any situation. As Byron Katie says, “It’s not the problem that causes our suffering; it’s our thinking about the problem.”
8. Go slowly.
Slow down, you move too fast. You got to make the morning last. Those are the lyrics that always pop in my head when I start to rush. For better or worse, I am humming or singing along for the rest of the day. You know you are moving too fast if you feel worn out all the time, if you are constantly saying things like, “one more thing” or “just a sec” or if it’s really challenging to stay on task and pay attention. This is how to slow down. If that doesn’t work, just sing along during your Gentle January, I got no deeds to do, no promises to keep. I’m dappled and drowsy and ready to sleep.
9. Cultivate quiet.
We need a break from the noise. Our strengths are born and nurtured in the quiet. Our softness thrives in stillness. The Gentle You craves quiet. The noise we need to distance ourselves from includes the people around us, the environment we live in, the phones we depend on, our TVs and other media. It’s everywhere. The world is noisy. We can’t wait for life to be quiet. We have to cultivate quiet. This is where we rest and renew. After some quiet time, you can think more clearly and be more thoughtful about creating, listening, connecting and loving.
10. Get daily reminders to enjoy your Gentle January.
When you preorder my new book, Gentle: Rest More, Stress Less and Live the Life You Actually Want, I’ll send you daily reminder starting on January 5th via text or email (your choice). From quotes and encouragement to gentle challenges, we’ll move through a Gentle January together. Once you preorder Gentle, fill out the form on the same page to receive this preorder bonus (and others). This book will guide you through three seasons of discovering and connecting with the Gentle You. The seasons of Rest, Less and Rise will bring you in with gentle practices, tiny steps and even a permission slip at the end of each chapter. If what you crave is something different from moving through life at an unsustainable pace, try Gentle.
Give yourself permission to savor a Gentle January and let it seep into the rest of your year.
